Sunday, December 30, 2007

Oh my Goth! They're gone

Kynt killed his and Vxysin's chances to win the "Amazing Race."

The Goths blew it. I was so rooting for them and then they just blew it. Nate and Jen made a few mistakes but it was nothing compared to Kynt and Vxysin. First they U-turned the wrong team and then Kynt didn't follow directions on the clue and then boom it was over.

They managed to complete the Speedbump in a great time and then they were ahead and then they lost their lead and never really recovered. So now my allegiance goes TK and Rachel.

They have class.

Episode grade: A

Friday, December 28, 2007

Checking out "The Office"

So far, I'm digging "The Office" at least Season 1.

My colleagues, Mike S and Karla P have been telling me how good "The Office" is. My friend Leslie told me she was watching it tonight and so since three people I care about say it's good, I'm went home and watched the copy that Karla lent me Season 1 to watch. And after two episodes my partner and I have been laughing our you know what's off.

Early impressions: I love Pam. Steve Carell's character is so funny and I'm warming up to Rainn Wilson.

We're working our way through Season 1 right now and I think we'll be adding Season 2 to our Netflix list. I'm sorry I'm late to the party on this, but I'm here now.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

I absolutely HATE NBC

Miss Patti, NBC robbed you last week in "Clash of the Choirs." Photo taken from Google images.

There is absolutly nothing on.

Before I wail away on this, let me go back to last week. I was desperately looking for something, anything to watch. I got sucked into "Clash of the Choirs" and I was actually entertained! If you missed it, five celebrities went to their hometowns and recruited people to be members of their choir. It came down to NIck Lachey and Patti LaBelle's choir and of course Nick's won. It sucked because Patti's was better and I think too many people thought Patti and her group had it in the bag and stopped voting.

And this is why NBC has broken my heart yet AGAIN. I don't know why I keep going back to NBC. We still don't know the fate of "journeyman," all signs point to it being cancelled but still no "official" word.

Luckily, CBS is stepping up their game with "The Amazing Race." My partner and his nephew tried out and they made this hilarious video and I hope they make the cut. If they do, I'll let the readers know.

Sunday, the goths had a nasty meltdown and they just couldn't get it together. However, they were spared from elimination because this was a non-elimination leg. Yay. The bad news, they have to do something called a "speedbump" where they have to do a task by themselves and then jump back into the race.

We'll see what happens on Sunday.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Can we get a Christmas miracle?: The Journeyman finale?

I feel sooo bummed right now. My show is gone. I pray NBC will reconsider. Photo by

NBC is run by idiots. Enuff said. We need a miracle, oh please, TV gods, save this show.

As Dan said to Zach this episode: "Do you know how much I love you?" "To the moon and back." That's how much I love this show.

And now it's gone. What we learned: Dan's power was activated after another time traveler died. The suspicious doctor doesn't know about Livia and he thinks Dan is the last. He also revealed that people are watching him because he might know too much.

I just wish we got to know MORE!!!

Series grade: A

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Don't forget to watch the final episode of "Journeyman"

Poor Zach, daddy almost wiped you out last episode. NBC chose to wipe you all out and Words. Cannot. Express. How.SAD I. Am!!!!!! NBC sucks. For real. Photo by

After Wednesday, it'll all be over. The BEST new show of the season will be gone because NBC didn't give the show a chance. It was well written, acted and amazing, but sadly no one watched except me and the cool kids. I'm totally buying the DVD if and when it comes out because it's worth it.

Last episode, Dan went back in time and left a digital camera which altered the course of the future and had a HUGE impact on his life because his son Zach wasn't conceived on the day he was supposed to be. Instead, Dan found he had a beautiful little girl named Caroline and was forced to make a choice. Live with Caroline or get back and get Zach back.

We also met a psychic who might have some answers as to why Dan is travelling in time and on Wednesday, we're supposed to get some answers. I hope that we finally will get the truth so we can let go. It's going to be hard to say goodbye but it usually is to good TV.

Season grade: A++++++++++++++

Anybody else feeling too danged fat?: The Biggest Loser finale!

Bill and his twin JIm kicked booty tonight on The Biggest Loser as Bill won $250,000 and Jim won $100,000.

After all these weeks, we finally saw who earned the title of "The Biggest Loser." And HOORAY it was one of the most deserving people: Bill! Some people looked amazing :Bryan, Jerry, Jez and even cheating old Neil! Some notsomuch: Amber, Patty and Lezlye. I'm proud of all these people because it takes mucho, mucho dedication to keep eating correctly and exercising. I've been struggling for years and I still haven't mastered it. Thank goodness I'm not the weight that these people were and if the fates are willing, I won't be either!

Maybe can get motivated by the next group because the new season starts in two weeks which is on, yep, you guessed it New Years Day!

Season grade: A+

Clash of the Choirs: Team Patti all the way!

It's only Day 2 but I'm calling it. Patti's team will win. Photo by

I wanted not to like this show. I got sucked in during the last 20 minutes on Monday when Patti LaBelle's team rocked the house. It took me back to my college days when I was the mascot of the gospel choir of the small liberal arts college I went to. We had some GREAT times on the road and although I can't carry a tune if you handed it to me, I know good music when I hear it.

It's tricky trying to get a bunch of folks to sing on key and in harmony. Patti's group is going this. Nick Lachey's group isn't bad either so I expect it be a battle between the two of them on Friday night. Thank goodness this is only a week but I will bet money they'll bring this show back.

Episode grade: B

Sunday, December 16, 2007

And the gay Mormans shall inherit the Earth: Todd wins "Survivor"!

You'd be smiling too if you won $1 million for lying and backstabbing. Survivor: China." GAWD help us.
And now it's over. Poor Amanda, a dumb decision left you holding the bag. You should have taken Denise and that would have made YOU the strongest player. All she did was sit there and look pitiful and unfortunately it didn't help you win.

I'm shocked, shocked, shocked that Todd won. I've discussed it over and over and Todd was never picked as my winner. Shows what I know. And my pick Amanda: Got one vote and that was from the virgin what's his name.

And his final appeal I think is what won him the needed votes. Courtney did surprisingly well because she got more votes than Amanda did including one from Denise who she said "sucks at life."

Speaking of sad, how sad was Denise's appeal to Amanda at the campfire saying this is all she had and that she would have to go back to making $7 as a lunch lady. I also felt awful for her because she said this ON NATIONAL TV where I'm almost certain her employers were watching. But of course it doesn't matter because she got canned! Oh, poor Denise... at least you won't be traumatizing kids with that mullet of yours. It's sad too that she's now a janitor. Sad, sad, sad.

And before I sign off: here's a shout-out to my homegirl who might have won.

Episode grade: B

Friday, December 14, 2007

And then there were four: "Survivor: China"

Here's my pick to win this year's "Survivor." Oh Amanda, you played a good game. Let's hope you win.

I'll be honest, when this season started I didn't pick these people to be in the final four. It just goes to show you what I know.

This year's final four are Courtney the waitress, Todd the bitchy flight attendant, Denise the lunch lady and Amanda the hiking guide.

They all played a good game and backstabbed and blindsided most of the jury. But that's what "Surivor" is all about. That being said, Sunday's finale should be soooo interesting because we truly don't know which way this is going to go.

Todd could win because people respected that he was upfront most of the time from the get-go.

could win by default because the jury might not like who she's up against.

Amanda could win because she played a pretty honest game and laid low until her master plan to get rid of James came into play.

Denise could win by default because she skated under the radar most of the time. And if she does win, could some spa please invite her to come so she can get some teeth whitening and a snazzy new 'do?

I hope these folks play smart because it really is anyone's ballgame.

If I were Denise, I'd take Todd because people really, really hate him. Ditto for Courtney. Todd is her ticket to the $1 million. Todd should take Courtney because folks hate her too and he might be lucky enough to win. Amanda needs to take Denise. Amanda could show how she used her wits to win while Denise just skated by.

Episode Grade: A

Thursday, December 13, 2007

So long, farewell and welcome back: Project Runway the recap

This outfit helped sister Christian to his first "PR"
win. Lord help us all.
Last night was one of the saddest/happiest episodes ever.
This week the designers had to make outfits for women who lost a ton of weight. The catch was they had to use material from each woman's favorite outfit pre-weightloss. One wound up wearing a wedding dress as her favorite outfit. (I'm like really? You really like that gawdawful dress?????) It kinda sucked because the material wasn't worthy of being re-done and who walks around saying her wedding dress was her favorite outfit?

Poor Steven drew that challenge and you knew it was going to be curtains for him. On the let's get even sadder front, Jack, the HIV+ designer was faced with a medical emergency a staph infection that was getting worse by the hour. He decided to leave the show so that he wouldn't put others at risk.

Now, don't hate me here readers but I have to bring this up: Didn't the show consider that he might be having some sort of emergency crisis? I know that he's been HIV+ for 17 years (basically ALL of his adult life) and that his body - while it is the eye candy that it is - and immune system might not be able to take the stress of a daily design competition? I'm not trying to be discriminatory, but seriously you'd think they'd have some sort of doctor on staff to deal with medical emergencies.

But just when our hearts were breaking and tears were dropping, they brought back Chris who was booted last week. And all was joyous in the land again!

While some of the women loved their fancy new duds, some weren't quite up to par with what the designers designed. A few were just downright wrong. And some were just fabric snobs which ultimately lead to the downfall of Steven.

Hey, if we're lucky he'll be brought back too!

Episode grade: B

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

No deal Howie: What's going on with "Deal or No Deal"

NBC is going to the well a few times too many for me with "Deal or No Deal." Photo by NBC. com

OK, I'm going to out myself: I like "Deal or No Deal." There, I've said it. Now, let me add this, I like it in controlled doses. For some reason, NBC is playing the HELL out of "DOND" this week with all these stunts like "Winner Take All" and a "Wheel of Fortune" like gimmick. That being said, they need to stop it. Stick to the folks picking the cases and let that be that.

They also need to stop picking these over the top folks like they have the past few episodes. I felt so bad for the girl who was a part of the Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority who wound up with $1,000 when she was poised to win more than $100,000 or the black woman who SCREAMED! EVERYTHING!! AT!!! HOWIE!!!!!!!! I mean good freaking LORD, who picked her?

I know they want people who will give them good television but a twirling, dancing minstral show is a bit much for me.

Reality week

This is the winner of "America's Next Top Model." Although she's good, there WAS someone better. Photo by CWTV.

With the writers' strike continuing, get ready for more than your fair share of reality TV. In fact it might be all reality, all the time.

But some reality TV will be taking a bow in the next few days to make way for a new batch of cringeworthy badness. Case in point: Tonight is the finale of "America's Next Top Model." Say what you want about Tyra "Kiss my fat ass!" Banks but she knows how to put forth an entertaining show. My guess is that Saleisha (pictured) will take the top prize because she's got everything the judges are looking for. It kinda sucks because there was a stronger model in the bunch but because of her form of autism, it prevented her from landing in the final three.

"Survivor" has its final episodes this week as we narrow the final five down to the final four and then to the final three during a two hour finale. It's been a crazy season and lord only knows who's going to win. Since my guy lost two episodes ago, I really don't care but I don't want Todd the bitchy queen to win.

And: Note to casting directors, not ALL gay men are bitchy 24/7 nor are we FAB-U-LOUS all the time either. This ain't "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy."

So now let's look at the new batch of shows: Tonight we have "Crowned" on the CW about a mother/daughter beauty pageant. (YAWN) and then NBC is rolling out "American Gladiators" which shows how desperate they are. What worked for the '80s won't work for the 00's I fear. I hope this crashes and burns quickly. And NBC also has this little gem to add: "Clash of the Choirs. which they have been promoing endlessly. I love Patti LaBelle but I want her gone from my set please. This show reminds me of "The Next Great American Band". What's that? You don't know TNGAB? Me either because I don't watch FOX.

It's only going to get worse and worse since the A-list shows are going to be on hiatus. Luckily we have cable and Netflix to keep our minds occupied.

It's over y'all: Journeyman has been cancelled.

You were too good for NBC Mr. Journeyman. NBC sucks. Photo by

I'm at a loss for words. NBC is really stupid for letting this show go.

Sunday, December 09, 2007

NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! "The Amazing Race" the recap

A costly mistake costs Azaria and Hendeka the race. Photo by

Before the recap, tryouts were yesterday here in San Diego. More than 1,500 people showed up including my partner and his nephew. They arrived in line at 6:15 and waited until 4 p.m. and didn't get seen. The reason was the cameras malfuctioned and they got a form to fill out and a note to tell them to mail their DVDs and application within a few weeks. They were No. 390 out of 1,500 people. So with a little work they might be able to make the race.

OK, now the recap of this episode: H&A got screwed. Screwed! I tell you. He told the travel agent "ECONOMY" and they gave them "BUSINESS" class tickets. And they just couldn't recover from that which sucks, sucks, sucks. It's sooo not fair. I'm so disgusted, I'm not going to tell you about how Nate and Jen screamed at each other and how Ronald is still and ass but Christina is a saint. And I love that Nate and Jen got beat by Ron and Christina. I love that Phil made them go back and come back! And I have to say it's funny how Ron did a shoutout to Charla and Mirna because they didn't know what a catamaran was.

Loved her melting down!!! and I knew that we were in trouble because they didn't even show H&A after the first 15 min.

Episode grade: F

Thursday, December 06, 2007

I'm Wilhemina Slater and I don't get wet: "Ugly Betty"

His milkshake still brings Betty to the yard. Photo by

I love "Ugly Betty" so much that I want to run away and make babies with it. OK, that was so dramatic but you get the point.
This episode, Betty was bored with Henry and wanted some excitement. Gio swooped back into the picture and caught Betty's attention much to Henry's dismay. But Hilda, who knows a good thing when she sees it, decided to give Gio a try.

Betty White guest starred and stole the show. She's put a kink in Willie's plan to open "Slater" magazine. Meanwhile, Daniel and Alexis fought for control of Meade publication during a paintball fight.

Henry, meanwhile, unveiled a fantastic body (who knew???) during an evening of dancing. And Hilda realized that Gio has it bad for Betty. (poor HIlda).

And Daniel asked Alexis if they could run Meade together but she took the shot and won the competition. Gio asked HIlda out but she realized that he likes Betty.

Meanwhile, the other Betty has the best line of the night: I'm going on TV with whore eyes. And Betty took this opportunity to milk the feud for more publicity.

And Willie pulled out one last trick to help stay in Meade: Bradford's baby. EWWWW

Episode grade: A+++++++++++

Oops. I have to deduct a plus because of the SHAMELESS promotion of THIS movie.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Ding, dong the witch is gone: America's Next Top Model

YAAAyyyyyy!!!!!. Photo by

They finally kicked the byotch out!!! Thank you Jebus! Girlfriend was EEEEEEEVIIIILLLLL and STAAAANNNKKKK and NAAAASTTY.

Tyra finally called her out on her naturalness in her moves and poses. She's "pretty" (it's debatable) and she's got a "strong face" but I hope she goes back to Queens and stays there.

I'm a bit sad because next week is the finale. My guess for the winner? This girl.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

"I am my best person when I have less on my plate": Tuesday's "Oprah"

This book is changing the face of the world. Image from

I normally recap primetime shows but as a closet "Oprah" watcher I had to talk about today's show. If you haven't heard about "Eat, Pray, Love" then you've probably been living under a rock. Don't be surprised if folks give you a copy for the holidays because people are flocking to it as if it were the Bible.

The premise: After realizing the life of her dreams, WASN'T what she wanted, author Elizabeth Gilbert decided to leave everything behind and go to Italy, India and then Bali to discover what the true meaning of HER life was.

I was skeptical at first but after watching these legions of women go on and on about how great the book was, I may give it a try during the writer's strike. When Oprah herself is looking at you like you're the greatest thing since sliced bread, it might be worth your time to give it a gander.

The author is a hoot and she's that partyguest that you'd want to stay after the last guest is gone.

Monday, December 03, 2007

Wow, just wow: "Heroes" the recap

Goodbye Nikki R.I.P. Photo by

I'm just floored. Just floored. We spent all of this time for this?

Maya shot and was dead and now she's alive? Nikki dead and killed in an explosion saving Monica. Nathan shot during a press conference but not before exposing the power of heroes?

It was just horrible. They have a great buildup but not a great ending. At least Sylar's been restored for now.

Episode grade: C

Sunday, December 02, 2007

The Amazing Race: The recap

Bye-bye blondes!!!!!! Photo by

One word: Karama!!!!!!!!!!

This recap won't mention the shameless promotion of THIS Web site.

Christmas, Christmas everywhere: 24hr Merrython

If you don't know who these folks are, you're probably under 20. Photo by Wikepedia

It's Sunday afternoon and I stumbled on TVland's 24hr Merryland. For 24 hours, TVland showed Christmas themed episodes of some of our all-time favorite shows. I got sucked into watching "Good Times," "The Andy Griffith Show" and my all time favorite "Little House on the Prarie."

The Ingalls family is in dire need of money for the holiday so each Ingalls worked on a way to get money to buy each other a gift for the holiday. It was sooo sweet and innocent than that's what's on these days. If you missed it this weekend, you can watch on Thursday nights (since the writer's strike looks as if it's going to continue you have nothing else to watch anyway) through the month of December.

Saturday, December 01, 2007

nip/tuck: the power watch recap

It's been a while since I've watched but I'm sooo glad I did. Photo by

This used to be my favorite show on TV but this season has been packed with goodness and with Tuesdays being jam-packed, this was supposed to be my show to watch on the weekends. Unfortunately, I let the last few pile up that is until today. And if I knew such scandalous goodness was resting on my DVR I would have worked to watch earlier.

The highlights of the last month: Sean is dating an actress on the set of "Hearts and Scalpels" but apparently she had gastric bypass and he made her fit and beautiful. But she's such a Debbie Downer that he dumped her because he's still in love with Julia.

Christian is struggling with Sean's sudden popularity in L.A. that he resorted to posing in Playgirl and even picking up desperate old women in bars all trying to recapture the popularity he had in Miami.

Of course they had to figure out a way to work Julia, Matt and Kimber in and here's how they they did it.

Julia near the end of last season took the kids, Annie and Connor and moved to NYC to be near her mom. While there she met a woman named Ollie and fell in love and now says she's a lesbian. Although, she had a tryst with Christian for a second, she still maintains she's a lesbian. Ollie, played by Portia de Rossi
comes with a special set of baggage: her teen-age daughter Eden. Eden is taking out her frustrations about her mom being a lesbian on poor Annie by telling the pre-teen that's she's too fat and ugly. She's also flirting a la "Lolita" style with Sean that is until Christian got her shipped off to rehab.

Matt shows up with baby Jenna and says he's left Kimber. He cons Christian and Sean (his two dads) into thinking he's trying to restart his life when in reality he's living in a fleabag with Kimber and they are both addicted to drugs. They are stooping so low (Kimber sleeping with the manager of the flea bag hotel, Matt getting thisclose into doing a gay porn feature).

You can just bet that the season will continue to get trasher and dirtier and I'll love every second of it.

Episode grades: A+

Friday, November 30, 2007

The plan to save "Journeyman"

Here's looking at you McKidd. I hope we'll see you after the strike. Photo by

On another message board, my secret identity is SDpaperboy. I've been on a one man crusade to get people to save this show. So here's the plan: Monday night, 10 p.m. download the last episode aired called "Blowback" on Itunes. It'll cost you $1.99 but it's worth it.

Get your friends to do the same and then get them to watch on Dec. 10 so we can see those numbers rise!

He dug his own grave: Survivor the recap

In the words of Florida Evans "Damn, Damn, DAYUM! Photo by

OK. Confession time: I haven't recapped "Survivor" in a while because I got bored and it had gotten lame. But after last night's surprise boot, it's suddenly veerrry interesting!

I have to admit, I had hoped that James the gravedigger, would go farther along in the game than this. One, because I thought he was a cool dude and two, I had him in my company's office pool!

Boyfriend got PLAYED y'all. Amanda the pixelated booty shaker came up with the plan to blindside him by voting him out. But first, Pee Gee, some dude I can't and don't care about and Denise the lunch lady all got to go to a Chinese temple and eat, rest and watch Kung Fu. Denise hauled out her moves and, and, (yeah, I'm going to say it) everybody was Kung Fu fighting! (Well, not really but they were showing off their moves).

Back at camp James, Todd, Amanda and Courtney were all thrilled saying that in a few days it could be them in the Final Four. Amanda, though, said she had to shake up the game and came up with the perfect plan to get James out.

And just like that, James, after losing immunity, got played. He had TWO hidden immunity idols and decided not to play them and he was voted out. You could see in his face before the voting that he was tempted to play one of them but trusted his teammates, thereby ignorning the cardinal rule of "Survivor" Don't TRUST ANYBODY.

(Sigh) there goes my $200.

Episode grade: B+

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

NO! NOOOOO!: America's Next Top Model the recap

I don't care who wins. THIS is MY America's Next Top Model. Photo by

Can you BELIEVE this???

I was floored! Floored!! Bianca did well! Heather sucked???!! Heather got booted! LORD! LORD! LORD!

I feel sooo sorry for her because she couldn't find the go-sees. It was soo, soo sad.

Episode grade: WTF

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Time is running out: SAVE JOURNEYMAN

If NBC has its way, Livia and the rest of the "Journeyman" gang may go POOF!. Photo by

TV is breaking my heart. Another one of my shows is in danger of being yanked from the schedule. I'm beginning to think that cheap reality show crap is all people care about.

A few posts ago, I told you that "Journeyman" will be cancelled if more eyeballs don't get on this show. Please, if you're reading this, e-mail and call this woman:

Park, Joanne
Senior Press Manager - NBC Entertainment Publicity (Project Assignment: "It's a Wonderful Life" "The Singles Table" "Journeyman" "The Office")
Phone: (818) 840-4579
Fax: (818) 840-4943

Please!! A show is in danger!

So long Red Team: So long Kim! So long big guy

Bryan was the last good guy left in the game. Kim sucks as a trainer. Photo by

I have a confession: I've stopped watching this show from beginning to end. It's just tooo long, toooooooooo drawn out. Instead I cruise in for the weigh ins and then check out the voting. Tonight: Holly and Brian fell below the yellow line and of course Bryan was sent home. It's a Biggest Loser first: An entire team G-O-N-E!

Bryan was my favorite because if he can work hard and lose the weight, then anyone can. He's an amazing person and I wish him well.

Monday, November 26, 2007

One episode left: Heroes

Yeah girl, I want to put the hood over my head too. Photo by

Is there all there is? After last episode's stellar episode, they come with this dud. The good: One half of the Wonder Twins was killed. The bad thing: it was the likable one.

Monica found out that her powers don't make her immune to stupidity as she was captured by a local gang while she was trying to retrieve Micah's stuff.

Claire acts like a bratty bitch most of the episode and we discover that Mohinder is the one who saved HRG and we learn that Claire and her crew plan to leave and move to Salt Lake City. The cool thing is the battle of the blondes (Claire vs. Elle) And Claire finally takes a stand against the company. Sylar calls Mohinder and tells him that he has Molly in his possession.

Hiro time travels in the past and learns Adam's plan goes to confront him. And we end Hiro vs. Peter. Wow.

Episode grade: C

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Chickens and goats: Oh MY! The Amazing Race

A U-Turn derailed Jason and Lorena's quest for $1 million. Photo by

Sooo many things to say about this episode! The blondes in a word: suck. But I skip ahead: TAR unveiled a handy new trick to cause the racers misery: The U-Turn. How it works is this: If a team gets U-turned they have to finish BOTH assigned tasks instead of choosing the one they think they can do. Unfortunately for Jason and Lorena, they had to do an African dance (those dances were hilarious!) AND pan for gold which lead to their early dismal.

It's too bad because I actually wanted to see more Lorena meltdowns like last week. And what's going on with the animals? last week animals, this week goats! I felt sorry for the poor goats. And what's up with Jen's pissy attitude? "Everybody deserves a turn? This ain't Miss America honey, it's the Amazing RACE!

Episode grade: B+

R.I.P Bradford Meade: A very late "Ugly Betty" recap

So long Bradford. Photo by

I've said it once, I've said it twice, the show just keeps improving episode by episode. After last week's death of Bradford Meade and Betty's promise to help Daniel, Betty's got a case of the guilts as she keeps seeing Mr. Meade everywhere.

MM tells Betty she needs to go back to Mode but she says she didn't like the person she was becoming there. The day of the funeral, Hilda, Papa Suarez and Justin all prepare for the annual "let's get the tree ready" ritual. Hilda wants a hot pink fire retardant tree and Justin reminds everyone that "Pink is the new green." but after he gets the Xmas lights from his room from when "he turned his closet into a night club."
Betty dashes off to MM's funeral but not before Hilda reminds her that she could have quit AFTER she got the Xmas bonus. (I'm with Hilda on this).

At the funeral, Daniel discovers from Alexis that MM bought a huge family plot for all of them and he's stunned. The police escort Claire to the funeral and just as things were settling down, Willie shows up with Marc in tow. Marc shouts out "I can't believe she came! What's she doing here! Who's she wearing!" to create a classic dramedy moment! And just when you think the laughs end there, Claire trips Willie into the open grave. Claire, Alexis and Daniel all vote to terminate Willie.

But they obviously must not know about girlfriend because she's not going down without a fight. She goes back to the Mode offices and activates a virus that wipes out the entire issue called Medusa X. (I gotta get me one of those!)

Henry's at the office and calls Daniel and Alexis and they scramble to get the issue ready. And of course, Betty is already there waiting and somehow managed to beat them both back to the office and called all the staff ready to report for work. Willie shows up, reveals HER new magazine and then manages to take most of the staff. When she offered free plastic surgery, Amanda tells Betty to "Go! GO!"

Willie tells the remaining staff to enjoy and they remind her of the orchestra that played as the Titanic was sinking.

Back at Casa Suarez, Hilda complains about the tree and accidentally sets it on fire. Oops!

At Mode, everyone is scrambling to bring the issue to the presses and it winds up that Henry gets to be the food editor, Betty takes over books and Amanda gets the "What's Hot" feature. Daniel realizes that they need to reshoot the cover and breaks their cover model Cameron (Eliza Dushku who totally deserves a nod for this role) out of rehab.

Amanda is feeling the heat and keeps reminding everyone that she's Fay Summers daughter and it finally takes Sheila to tell her that she's out of her league. Alexis is busy trying to keep the printer happy and tries to seduce him until she realizes that he's a dwarf. They bond over "My dad didn't love me" stories and he agrees to keep the presses running.

At Mode, the photoshoot goes horribly wrong and Betty inspires Daniel to produce a black cover commemorating MM and then renumbers the issues.

Willie's busy trying to secure funding and is shocked when her father turns her down. At Mode, everyone pulls together and the issue hits the stands. Back at CS, Betty surprises everyone with a fully decorated tree.

The end! Feliz Navidad!!

Episode grade: A+

Friday, November 23, 2007

I'm joining the cult of Angie Harmon

Police woman: Angie Harmon rules Friday nights Photo by

"Women's Murder Club" is my new Friday night guilty pleasure. Angie Harmon is fan-freaking-tastic. So fantastic that I'm joining the cult. I wish I could go back and watch her on "Law and Order." The thing that is amazing is this show is something that I wouldn't totally like and yet I'm entralled. It's like Sex and the City with guns or in the middle of a morgue.

But according to some bloggers, the show isn't doing well either. While I'm not begging this show be saved, I'd be sad if it were cancelled. It's smart, funny and entertaining. So if you're bored on a Friday night, give it a try. Tell them the Remote sent you.


Yep, your eyes aren't deceiving you, that's Sarah Jessica Parker getting her runway on. Photo by

My DVR lied and said that there were no new episodes of "Ugly Betty," nor "Project Runway." Luckily, I had the sixth sense to record them both.

Unfortunately, I can't recap "Betty" right now, that'll have to wait until over the weekend, but I can do "PR".

A word to Ricky: Honey, I love you but all this crying NEEDS TO STOP. We get it, it's stressful, this is your big chance, blah, blah, blah. I can only imagine what things are like at home when he and his partner have breakfast: Him: "Hon? The eggs aren't done." Ricky: "WAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!"

This week's challenge: Design a dresss for SJP's Bitten line. Everyone went craz-y over SJP because she's a fashion-icon. Really? I watched "Sex and the City" and thought her look was hor-ri-ble 2/3 of the time. It looked like she went into her closet and just starting putting crap on and whatever happened, happened.

Chris boo-hooed like he met Jesus for the first time and the rest of my gay peeps were beside themselves with joy. Even some of the women were all ga-ga over this. I looked up the clothes and it looks like Old Navy with a twist to me.

It came down to Christian channeling dresses from "Addicted to Love" the video and Marion and his gunny sack. As you can see, this is the dress that got him "Auf'd"

Episode grade: B+
Next week: Ricky gets his byotch on.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

It's time to save our show!; "Journeyman" the appeal

It's time to take the journey, man: Watch this show!

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I didn't think I'd be writing this this early, but it's time to alert your friends. A great show is in danger of being cancelled and that's "Journeyman." If you don't watch this show you should because it's one of the best written, smartest shows on NBC's prime-time lineup.

The story is this: Dan Vassar is a report for a San Francisco paper who's have a great life until one day he finds himself traveling back and forth through time trying to save people and rewrite history. The time trips come at unexpected moments and he can't control it. Also in the mix is his ex-fiancee Livia who was supposedly "killed" in a plane crash, only she jumped through time too. She's his guide on how to get things done during the TT trips. Dan's wife Katie and 7-year-old son Zach know about the trips and they're covering for him. Add Dan's brother Jack into the mix (he's Katie's ex fiance) and the FBI who's getting suspicious and you have a great show. is reporting that unless the show improves on its ratings on Monday nights, it's um, history!

We need to mobilize. We need to stop this. If you're reading, get people to catch up with the two-minute recaps or full episodes that NBC has online and get them to take the journey with us.

Monday, November 19, 2007

"Stings like a bitch doesn't it?": Heroes the recap!

HRG captures Elle who gets her just desserts.

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Lordy! It's back y'all! The first season magic of "Heroes" is back. West and HRG teaming up! Mohinder being bitch-slapped by HRG! Matt exploring the full extent of his powers! All of this adds up to Heroes goodness!

I loved the secret origin of Elle! The Company corrupted Elle and made her evil. Bob taking some of Claire's blood. Hiro and his dad traveling back in time to his mom's funeral and Hiro running into a younger version of himself. (Although why he doesn't remember it is beyond me. Anybody think Hiro mucking up time might have long reaching ramifications?)

And it's cool he got to say goodbye before his father was killed. And it was cool that Hiro froze time to see who killed his father. LOVED the special effects on that one although how many of us figured it out weeks ago that it was Kenzi/Adam who killed his dad. Is the seeking revenge against Hiro or has he gone mad with power?

Angela and Matt's interview was great too. Loved her smugness too! Especially when he used his power on her to force to tell him the truth: Adam is immortal. Angela then began to spill her guts. It was awesome. And then she fought him every step of the way until her nose bled.

I also liked that HRG and West bonded over cars. It was awesome to hear Elle overhear the plan and shoot a lightning bolt into the sky, shocking West and then having Claire save them both.

And how shocking was it to see Mohinder shoot HRG in the eye making Issac's painting come true! And the twist at the end: Holy $H!!!!!

Episode Grade: A+

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Please lord give me milk: The Amazing Race the recap

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Oh sooo much to say. First: The blondes: I HATE, HATE them. The racist comments they kept making about Africa were insane.

And note to the blondes, the bad weather? That's the WRATH OF GOD!

I'm glad that Christina and her dad got along better. And they have GOT to do something about the bunching! The teams started out in Amsterdam and ended up in Bingo, Africa. Who knew there was a place named Bingo?

And Phil's hair was just too amazing for words. The final two were the sisters and Jason and Lorena who appeared seconds away from having a nervous breakdown.

But the thing that frustrated me the most? Our local channel couldn't hold the signal so we couldn't see for looong stretches of time. BOO channel 8!

And it came down to a foot race and Lorena and Jason beat them. If only Julia and Marianna didn't help them by telling them to go to another camel for milk.

Friday, November 16, 2007

The hidden jewels of primetime

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Two shows I want to put on your radar: "Women's Murder Club" and "Journeyman." Both are based in San Francisco.

"WMC" stars Angie Harmon and it's basically "Sex and the City" in the middle of a squad room. The other members of the group are Jill the D.A, Claire the M.E. and Cindy the cub reporter. The murder mysteries are complex and good and best of all it's on Friday night when there's nothing else on.

"Journeyman" stars Kevin McKidd who's all sorts of wonderful and awesome rolled up in fantastic. The ratings aren't good for this show even though it follows "Heroes." Kevin's character Dan is a reporter for a paper in San Fran and travels through time. The show is amazing and you really, really need to watch.

I still miss it

Photo by ABC

In August 1994, ABC quietly rolled out a show about a 15-year-old girl name Angela Chase who lived in a suburb of Pittsburg. Angela lived with her mom Patty and dad Graham and bratty kid sister Danielle. At school she hung out with drunk and hurting Rayanne and sexually ambigous but later full-on gay Ricky. Across the street, her neighbor Brian Krakow quietly pines for her and tries to be a part of her life as much as possible.

It didn't get much of a viewership and 19-episodes later it was cancelled.

It was the first TV show that I ever loved at an adult. I was late to the party because I was busy setting up my life in a new state and was struggling to come to terms with issues in my life and then I saw the Christmas episode. To this day, it ranks in the Top 10 hours of TV in my opinion.

The thing that was cool about "MSCL" is this: It was the WB before there WAS a WB. The kids weren't perfect and neither were the parents. The kids drank, smoked and had sex and felt so damn REAL.

In my high school there WAS a Rayanne, an Angela, a Ricky and of course a Jordan Catalano (Poor Jared Leto. When he dies I'm betting this role will STILL be listed on his obit).

If you cherish good TV or know someone who does, then you can now own all 19-episodes in the recently released boxed set. The sad thing about this show is that it ended with a doozy of a cliffhanger : Does Angela know that Brian wrote that love letter to her? In the boxed set we get some answers to some lingering questions such as what happened to the on the rocks relationship of Patty and Graham. And we learn that someone was going to get pregnant.

Fall in love with high school all over again by buying this set.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

It's sew time!: Project Runway the recap

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Dear Heidi, Tim, Nina and Michael.
I've missed you.
Heidi, I've missed your attempts and trying to be funny and those weird looks you give the dresses that come shimming down the runway. Tim, I've missed your class, your style your, um, what's that? You have a show on Bravo? Hmm. I watched it but tried to pretend it didn't happen. Since you're claiming it, I'm going to repress this conversation.
Where was I, oh yeah, oh Nina. There's something we need to say to you Nina: You're a bitch. There. We've said it. We still love you. And Michael you need to know two things: Old queens are NOT funny and stay away from the spray-on tans. Orange is NOT your color.

That being said: The show is back people!

Here's who I love: Chris, Ricky, and Rami are all just adorable. Chris, Rami needs to put you on a diet quickly. I know you're thinking "This ain't Survivor, it's a sewing/design contest but if you can't run 500 feet to get some cloth, there's a problem.

Steven and Christian are battling to be this season's byotch. Although we as viewers should just raise some money to give Christian so he can have the operation because he's all woman.

Elisa, Sweet P (So not kidding here) and Kit are all trying on the "Strange but true garb."

And then there's the beefcake factor of Jack who's going to drop this bombshell : SPOILER ALERT: He's HIV+. Although I suspect someone in the editing department is in love with him because why in the world would they show him in tighty-greenie underwear unless they wanted us to see that he's got a hot bod.

There's some other folks in the contest but none of them made an impression on me yet.

The first challenge was to make a garment that defines you as a designer and our homeboy Ricky did this cute Babydoll dress
which I thought wasn't bad but Nina wasn't thrilled with it. In the end though it came down to this hideous dress from Simone and the other from Elisa and Simone was given the boot.

Episode grade: B+

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Oh God, in your mercy, help me out here: ANTM the recap

Photo from CWTV

There's a new byotch in town and her name is Bianca. This episode the girls serve as muses for up and coming designers. However, let's talk about the designer thing for a sec. Anyone else find it odd that this episode arrived the same night as Project Runway? I know CW owns Top Model but wouldn't it be cool if the Top Models and the PR folks filmed at the same time and we saw the show from the model's and designer's perspective.

And let's talk about those hideous dresses! Only one was cute and that was Ambreal. And did you see Bianca gloat. I'm sooo glad that Saleisha. I'm glad that Lisa got to go too. Although I hate, hate Saleisha's hair. She looks like Tootie from "Facts of Life"

And oh LORD! Jaslene is at Wal-Mart??!!! How low can we go here? And do you notice that when they show Jaslene's commericials, they quickly show a good Covergirl commercial afterward??

So then they dump the girls out in the desert and they had them pose against a burning car. Who COMES up with these challenges??

Bianca kept stirring up crap with Ambreal and Jay and of course she made Heather continue to doubt herself. At judging, Ambreal, Heather and Lisa all took a hit while Bianca shined. This makes me wonder: Is Bianca the new Eva? I pray, pray, pray she doesn't win. Heather is spared but LIsa and Ambreal isn't. And Lisa is crying a river.

Ambreal stands strong and holds herself together. And poor Ambreal, she managed to hang on two more weeks. I had picked Ambreal to win so now I'm throwing my allegiance to Lisa which I suspect means she'll be gone next week.

Monday, November 12, 2007

R.I.P. DL: "Heroes" the recap

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That was it? That's how DL died? Really NBC?? That was so lame. And even lamer: the Wonder Twins. Bo-ring. That time could have been used to discover what happened with Sylar.

I love Kristen Bell. But Elle? Notsomuch. I want Veronica back.

So it looks like Nikki has a new personality: Gina the party girl. And I think tonight we discovered Mama Petrelli's power: The power of persuasion. That being said: Did she cause her husband to kill herself?

Now we know how Nathan got healed but does that mean he now has this power too? And that being said, will "Adam" be sacrified to save everyone else?

So many questions: no answers.

Episode grade: B

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Grandpa wears bikinis!: The Amazing Race: the recap

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First EWWW. I could have done without seeing Grandpa in his black drawers. Was it me ordid this episode have the most complicated tasks ever. And my GAWD: I just wanted to slap the crap out of Ronald. He was uncessarily mean and cruel to her. He even claimed to be the Archie Bunker of the home.

I also loved the fact that even though Kate and Pat came in last, I liked that they kissed and enjoyed each other. But I knew they wouldn't last because they seemed to take it as though they were on vacation as opposed to them being, oh, I dunno, on a race!

I also liked that the tables were turned on a bunch of the yellers of the race. The people who were calm seemed to be the folks who managed to figure out a way to do all the tasks.

But next week seems to be awesome with someone losing their mind with a camel!

Episode grade: B

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Beat it, Mama's weave can't get sweaty on her big day: "Ugly Betty" the recap

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Dear Emmy people:
Forget the rest. This show is the winner. Seriously. Forget Grey's. Skip whatever else is out there because "Ugly" is where it's at.

Can this show continue to get better? The answer: yes!

Sooo much to love. From Henry and Betty snuggling: She in her sunflower T-shirt and he in his New York baseball shirt. It's nerd love and it's AWESOME!

I didn't get the magic of Posh Spice but lordy, I do know because she stopped by and stole the show. (loved the cameo from the real Vera Wang. How DO they get these folks to appear on this show???)

Daniel was having jealousy issues as Alexis was busy trying to save the magazine. And Willie said it best that Danny and the tranny the dynamic duo was still trying to save this rag.
Daniel discovered that Willie and the bodyguard were having an affair.

Amanda and Mark were adorable/funny/bitchy/funny/bitchy/sad/bitchy as usual. And of course I loved Amanda's "Transfatty" comment. Followed by Mark saying "Beauty is pain."

Of course Henry was also just soo wonderful when he put Betty's needs in front of his and demanding that she goes to her father's citizenship ceremony. It was soo emotional when the two locked eyes. Loved Mark breaking up with Cliff at the wedding and Amanda giving him the shimmy. It was great when they got back together too.

And Christina got some loving from her ex and appears to be falling back in love. And he's looking for $100,000 for an experiemental treatment. (Hmmmm...)

And you knew they were going to play "Ebony and Ivory." and it was hysterical. And you knew Betty was going to bust into the wedding. And you knew that Willie was going to put Posh away somewhere.

And the ending: to die for!

Episode grade: A+


According to Entertainment Weekly the bible of all things entertainment, the writers strike had caused a delay in "24."

So if you're going to be jonesing for Jack in January, you are SOL.

Pray that the writers get what they want so we can get what WE want and that's great TV.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Keeping it sexy: "America's Next Top Model" the recap

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This week the girls tried to bring sexy back by learning how to move sexy in a video by Enrique Iglesias. (I'm like wow, is this the best they can do??) The song isn't half bad but it felt very "Matrix-y".

Bianca really, really needs to stay away from the Hater-aid. She gives Bitch a bad name. All she did was bitch, bitch, bitch and hate on Heather throughout the whole episode. And that's soooo not attractive.

Ambreal was facing some serious self-esteem issues and kept saying that "She wasn't supposed to be there." It's quite apparent too that Tyra isn't impressed by her anymore because whenever there was a chance to hurt her, she took it.

Sarah too was on the "I have no self-esteem train" because she kept saying how awkward she was feeling around all the skinny girls. And Chantal kept saying how she wasn't nervous and how she had her act together.

At that point, I pegged both of them for the bottom two. And despite a scare from Heather almost fainting on the hot video set and Ambreal looking a bit too dead in the face, I was right about the bottom two.

Sarah was kicked out because she was unfairly pegged as a "plus sized model," which totally sucks.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Another one bites the dust! The Biggest Loser: the recap

photo from

I'm really sorry that Ryan got the boot tonight. He seemed to be one of the more honorable players in this game. I hope he continues his his weight loss.

I'm also sick of the NBC goes green because we get it! The earth needs us. And why is Neil being made out to be the only villain?

Monday, November 05, 2007

I want to make sure I'm doing the right thing: Heroes: the recap

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Yay! My show is back.

It's getting better again. This episode we had our heroes team up to stop nightmare man. And the big reveal: "Adam" is Kensei and he's the big bad behind all the shenanigans!

Hiro finally leaves Japan after totally altering history. Nikki injects herself with a new strain of the virus and the cure? Our own Claire.

We also learn that the future is a very bad place because there's a nasty virus that's wiping out humanity. Peter finds out when he accidentally transports him and Caitlain in the future and accidentally leaves her there.

West learns who Claire's dad is and that leads to a confrontation and Claire tells her family that if they leave they are going to have to leave without her. But the big thing is when Mohinder spills the beans to Bob about what he's been doing with Noah.

Next week: What happened after the big boom!

Episode grade: A

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Whoopie! Knocked up sluts and celibate freaks let's start the party.

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And to think, I almost gave up on this show. This season, the fun, the sassyness, the intrigue of the first season is back. Yay!

This episode's theme: Halloween. Bob and Lee threw a party that no one will soon forget.

But first we had Carlos leaving Edie and Gaby trying to leave Victor until Victor's dad presented a check that'll keep her married until after the election.

Carlos outsmarted Edie and moved his money so she can't find it. But then Carlos spills the beans to Gaby about his offshore account to Gaby.

Susan discovers that Mike's dad is alive and demands to see him. Mike's acting weird and it looks as if he's addicted to some sort of drugs. Susan gets on her high horse and blasts her dad after meeting him in prison.

But back to the party: Bob and Lee have a party with Dead Man's party. Danielle crashes the party as doing a spot on impression as Bree.

Lynette meanwhile is hunting a possum that's destroying her garden. Luckily she got some gun tips from Bree so she can possibly take the possum out. But we discover the possum is symbolic of her cancer and she's trying to kill it.

Danielle is a hit at the party until her water breaks. Adam comes over to help deliver the baby and he calls Bree out on faking a pregnancy. Danielle delivers a baby boy as the Scavio kids look on through a window.

Bree and Danielle talk with the new baby in Bree's arms. Bree suggests that Danielle holds the baby and she submits. She then tells Bree she wants her to take the baby.

Gaby tells Victor that she's leaving him. And then he tells Gaby that he's going to start making more time for her and he actually shows some compassion toward her.

Susan is still on her high horse and then goes to see Mike's dad and tells him that she doesn't believe that Mike's dad does feel some remorse. Mike's dad tells Susan to watch out for Mike's demons which makes her even more panicked.

Edie comes over to see Victor and reveals the affair that Carlos and Gaby had. At Lynette's, the doctor tells Lynette's has beaten her cancer! (Yay!)

And just as she's celebrating, she sees the possum she wanted dead and cries over it. Meanwhile, Bree says goodbye to Danielle and Lynette revels in being cancer-free.

And they're off: The Amazing Race, the recap!

Photo from

I love this show! Where else can you travel around the world from the comfort of your couch? Just think in one hour we went from the steps of the Playboy Mansion to the green shores of Ireland? I'm sooo glad that awful Hugh Jackman/Melanie Griffith show got cancelled so we can get a real entertaining show on TV.

These are the teams I hate so far:

Mirianna and Julia: They're two sisters and they scream and yell too much.

Ari and Staella: She's not so bad but Ari is a byotch and needs to get some help. When you threaten to cut up and eat a donkey that's bad. Thank goodness we don't have to deal with them anymore because taxi-stealing karma got them good. I hope PETA calls them.

Jennifer and Nathan should NEVER get married and NEVER be allowed to have children. And her pushing the donkey didn't help.

Shanna and Jennifer aka the blondes remind me too much of the beauty queens from the last two seasons.

I really like : Azaria and Hendekea and Ronald and Christina. The both are families and you can tell they are in it for fun and competition.

I'm kinda meh on the rest of the teams. I had hope for the lesbian ministers but they seem to be chillin a bit too much for me. TK and his girlfriend need to get it together quickly.

So far it looks as if Azaria and Hendy and the goths are the teams to watch out for. Although when Phil was describing the trip for two to the brother to Azaria and Hendy I was a little creeped out.

The thing I LOVE most about this game: You can go from first to last to first again in an instant.

Episode grade: A+