Celebrity Duets: It's like crack....

I'm beginning to think that twice a week isn't enough. I need my fix and luckily, it's on.

The big mystery? Where did Little Richard go? To the psycho ward? To rehab? To an assistance center? I dunno.

Tonight's show was bad, bad, bad. I don't know where to begin, OH, let's just start with Wayne Brady's Green plaid vest, purple shirt or black pants. It's like color has exploded. Plus, he didn't have the body to pull off the vest. I'm no size two, but still, I know not to squuuueezzeeee myself into something that's inappropriate.

The group singing needs to stop. It was awkward and just awful. Plus they need to choose song that some people's voices can actually handle.

If this gets a second season, I'd like for them to actually have people who can really sing or at least carry a tune. My partner keeps pointing out that Jai sounds like a "background" singer and not a real singer. But, I gotta say, it takes a LOT of guts to put yourself out there for the world to see.

Jesse McCartney hasn't had a hit in like, what, three years? But he still got people screaming for him. And did you see the girls bum rushing the stage??? It was nice of Wayne to plug Jesse's album as well.

Alfonso and Denice sang well but I couldn't concentrate because of the unfortunate gold number that Denice was wearing. It looked like she was headed toward Studio 54 and got lost. But it was upercute that Alfonso and Denise color coordinated though. Wayne also reminded everyone that the Carlton Dance would be done if Alfonso made it. That alone makes me want to pick up my phone to see him do it.

Dionne Warwick, pulled out one of her old outfits from her days as host of "Solid Gold." and she and Lucy Tuneless also color coordinated. Lucy looks flawless but the voice is flawFUL. And Lucy, please, please, find a song you CAN sing! Wayne says they got a standing ovation, but I swear I only saw five people stand up.

Poor Hal Sparks got stuck with "Mr. Roboto" which I was glad to hear because I think I was like in eighth grade last time I heard this song. And get this, Hal was singing the robotic part at first, I was thinking it wasn't fair, but luckily, he came out to sing some. He's still YELLING AT ME!! Stop. YELLING! HAL!

OH, and I see they used some of the budget to get the stage to move. Marie looks like she smelled something at the end of Hal's performance.

Hal Sparks was in the bottom three!! The voting is rigged. There is NO way that Lucy Tuneless got the most votes out of everyone! Unless they have one heckuva sound system on the East Coast.

Carly announced that she's going to be seeking a musical career. Let's hope tonight's performance when she sees it will dissuade her of that.

BTW: America agreed because she got her booty bounced!